what we've become~

Have we become a nation of people who are unknown to the depths of love? Do we not understand the greater truth in human emotion? What possibly could we do without coming to terms with such sorrows?

I believe in pain, suffering and love. Both different ends of the spectrum. However, for us to understand love, we must understand sacrifice. For the mother, she gave all she had to make sure the son flourishes in all that he does. No matter what, she is there for him. When he takes drugs and overdoses, she is by his side waiting for him to wake up. When he fails to succeed in work, she offers him a home. When he's at his lowest and loses everything, she offers him her shoulder. The pain in her eyes as she looks at her lowly son, is something most people can not understand. The pain that she feels when you are down. You can feel the sorrow which comes from the welling of her eyes. Can you not see the pain? Can you not see how much your mother had to endure for the sake of you? When you alone, are her treasure and her strength to carry on. But you throw it all away for some earthly treasure not worth risking your life for. I remember I dreamed horribly for a few months trying to help you realise what love is. But nothing got through to you. There's nothing else I can do.

Emotional and physical sacrifice are factors which contribute to our own realisation of what love truly is. For God to see his own creation plunder, horde, destroy and kill would be like watching a burning nation turn to ashes before you. Your family, your friends, everyone are in that nation. You look so helpless as you peer into the foreboding fire and flames as buildings fall to their knees and hear the screaming of your brother, or your sister. Tears roll down your face. But you stand up firm and stout. You try to help in every way possible to save these people whom you love. So what do you do? You work one step at a time. You fetch you pail of water and start extinguishing the flames. You pour water on yourself to help ease the burning of your skin as you try to pull people from the rubble and flames. For God, he saw his creation burning. He saw how much pain we were in. He saw how much sadness was in this world. He gave Himself up to save us. It seems stupid, I know. But for people to become truly sensitive towards the fact that creation is supposed to understand Love, we must first understand this kind of sacrifice. For a Christian, Love is God and God is love. This is such a crucial evidence for Human Creation by a superior being, that is God. The fact that humans possess emotions far beyond any other creature and being able to understand depths of love is somewhat interesting. We go on with our lives believing that short term goals (or as we perceive as long-term goals) can contribute to our happiness. Yes, it does for a while, until you realise that there is no basis of being accepted and loved. Accepted by status and not by love.

When will we understand this love given to us? I believe the only way, is to actually feel the pain in forms unimaginable, that is how God teaches us. Through suffering can we only understand what God has given to us. Those who are non-Christian and are reading this, you may seem a little provoked are probably aren't even reading to this point. But I think as humans, we all endure hardships in life whether we may be Christian, Aethiest, Muslim or Buddhist. We all want to have an understanding of who we are, where we come from and why we are here. In the end we all struggle with this very fact. Civil society and human law have subdivided us into separate nations, caused wars and pain. Is it not then evident that being human is destructive? Is it not then evident that the good in this world is non-existent? Yes, you may say, I'm such a happy person blah blah blah. But when you hit the epitome of sadness, you always turn to someone. Someone you cry to. Someone you hit and blame for your misdeeds. When you feel the sense of loneliness given to humans, only then will you understand that human interactions are nothing when love is not there. The love you seek is not in this world. The undying love which you believe is existent in the opposite sex is not existent. They will let you down from time to time, yet you still find the strength to persevere and try to find it again. We still can't see this God. But this is why I believe in God. You must understand what it feels like to be in pain of this world to understand love. And that love comes from somewhere else not on this world.

I love you all so deeply and I wish that you'll join me in creating something more special in this world. I know I haven't been the best person. I have hurt people. I have made my family cry in anger at a rebellious son. But I want to change. And Slowly will I do so. It'll be hard for me, but pray for me and rebuke me please.